Louise’s musings…getting to know thy self

my first blog post in about 8 years. Why now? Well, so much has happened since then and life has become more complex and complicated in almost every way. More specifically, my radiology oncologist and I decided that a 8 week break from my hormone inhibitor medication, commonly used by women who have undergone some kind of treatment for breast cancer, should be paused so that I can review any changes in my mood so as to better understand if there are any side effects of the medication.

Gosh, that was a heavy sentence. We’ll get to all of that as I try to navigate through it myself.

The purpose of the blog was really to help me track those feelings and record them as I am not always the best at recognising changes in myself or the impact on my mental or mental physical well being. This is my log. It coincided with a conversation I was having with a friend at work, getting ready for the arrival of her first baby. I mentioned that during my pregnancy with Ollie, I had written a baby blog. Upon remembering, I found said blog and read a number of my earlier posts. It reminded how much I like to write and brought me great joy rehashing some hilarious moments in my journey to motherhood. I thought then, let’s kill two birds with one stone. Actually a number of birds to be honest. So here I am.
Unsurprisingly nothing much to report mood wise. Not sure what changes I am looking for a whole 40 hours post my last tamoxifen tablet. Maybe in a week, my expanding waistline will shrink, my skin will clear up and my back will stop hurting. Likely that’s all a result of the distinct lack of exercise I’ve had for the most part of 2024 and nothing to do with the many side known side effect of this drug. It would be fucking awesome to be proven wrong and to suddenly snap back….nah!

anyway, glad to be back having chats with myself and whoever I ultimately share this with. Can’t promise exciting times ahead but will work to document whatever flows from me on to the ‘page’, forever memorialised, or at least until I forget my username and password and abandon the initiative as a nice to have amongst all of life’s must haves.
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